GHOSTS: Are you letting the ghosts of your past haunt your present?
Spooky title right? Seriously though, what ghosts am I talking about? Well, I’m talking about those toxic little specters from your past that like to creep up behind you and sabotage what you are trying to do. And the worst part is they can come from anywhere. The stem from all events, even those that initially seemed innocuous.
I’m actually going to use myself as an example this time. I know, I know, what about the relatable topic? I’ve got a feeling a lot of you will relate to this. I’ll start be telling you that I grew up poor. No, like actually poor. We’re talking food stamps, free lunch, food pantry, thrift store, actually got a gift I donated to “less fortunate kids” back on Christmas morning poor. Add to the mix what I will sum up as saying was a very toxic home environment, and I had an Amityville level haunting going on early in life. I had all the toxic ghosts!
These ghosts of mine were determined to haunt me out of all my success and self worth. Anytime I thought of excelling past my beginnings they’d start shaking their chains of self doubt. The sound was oppressive and a full on bummer. They’d moan things like “you’re not good enough”, or “you don’t deserve it”, or worse yet, “just quit”.
These little creepers stuck with me for about the first 19 years of my life. It didn’t matter that I had friends, worked hard and paid for all my own things, or that I had a beautiful girlfriend that would become my wife. They just wouldn’t let up. It wasn’t until my first afternoon at Ft. Banning, Ga, in E. 2/19 INF that I was able to, for the first time ever, shut them up.
It was our first day of basic training and our drill sergeant had told us (60 total strangers) to make a plan and clean the barracks. Everyone was just standing there with no idea what to do and afraid to be the first one to speak. Everyone probably had an opinion on how to get the job done but no one wanted to say anything, well except for me. To this day I’m not sure what compelled me to speak first, but it would be the sentence that in so many ways would launch my career in the military and start getting rid of those ghosts, who even at that moment were howling that I wasn’t good enough.
I opened my mouth and what came out was actually a very efficient and fair plan to get the job done. Then it happened, no one disagreed. In fact they all said “great idea” and we made it happen! That’s when it dawned on me. None of these people knew me at all. They didn’t know where I was from, how poor I had been, where I went to high school, or what my upbringing had been like. The only thing they all knew about me was that I took charge and had good ideas. Ask anyone who met me after that day and they will tell you that Travis has no problem opening his mouth!
From just that sentence I would be able to actively decide for myself who I was and who I wanted to become. The realization that none of my past had any impact in that moment meant I was in control of my future and not the ghosts of my past
Look, we’ve all got those ghosts in our lives. And just like me, they will try and rob you of your future. The beautiful part is that none of what they are howling about has to define who you are today. YOU get to decide who you are and who you want to become. What’s more is you can actively make that decision anytime you want. Even down to deciding you’re going to do it differently when walking into a new job, relationship, heck even just the next room.
So, I challenge you, the net time your ghosts start wailing away in an attempt to put the chains of your past on your future and feeling of self worth, shake them off like T Swift! Remind yourself that you are in charge of you and you get to DECIDE who you want to be!
